From the Couches: it’s a trap

Don’t be fooled by the evil :imp: scientist, Sir Neal Henderson. He claims to have made 23 workouts easier, under the guise of scientific testing to ensure the intended results. You can read his “solution”to the linked post for more details.

This is a diabolical plot of our northern neighbors who want everyone to suffer as much as they do. They want you to be able to suffer for weeks at a time! Their 3:1 training plans are devastating, three weeks of suffering followed by another week of “reduced” suffering. It’s still suffering.

Sufferlandria has been steadily encroaching on our borders. With their new training app they plan on taking over the world. The lure of easy workouts is a lie. Many Couchlandrians have been enticed away from a life of ease, sloth and comfort. They have been duped into exercising and tempted with plans that only look easy to the unwary observer. Don’t be fooled! These workouts will still hurt you!



They won’t catch me. I’m fully ensconced in the Advanced Couchlandrian Tendencies Accelerator Plan. Thanks for the heads up though. Sneaky Sufferlandrians, changing their app name, hiding all the Suffering behind some colourful chevrons. Pshhaw.