Have you ever wondered how a Sufferlandrian Pain Shake is made? It is not blended. It is not stirred, it is forged. Our brand-new Sufferfest session: The Pain Shake is available now in Wahoo SYSTM!
Today, you have been given the singular honour of being the primary catalyst for a new, experimental batch: “Quad-Burning Cayenne & Tears of Despair” flavor. You are the Human Centrifuge. Your bike is connected directly to the main churning vat at SUF Lactic Acid Refineries LLC, where a master Pain Shake Mixologist will demand specific power outputs to create the perfect flavor profile. Too little effort, and the shake is weak and tastes of Couchlandria. Too much… well, no, there’s no such thing as too much.
What to Expect
This workout is designed specifically to boost your Maximal Aerobic Power (MAP) through a brutal over-under workout variation.
The Structure: You’ll alternate intense 90-second MAP efforts with 3-minute “recovery” segments that stay strictly above standard endurance pace, keeping your heart rate and breathing redlined for the entire session.
Phase 1: The Emulsification: Short bursts of high power to agitate the base ingredients.
Phase 2: The Infusion: Sustained efforts to steep the Misery into the mixture.
Phase 3: The Churn: All-out power to achieve the perfect, agonizing consistency.
This is your chance to contribute to the very essence of our nation. Do not create a bland, tasteless concoction. Forge a masterpiece of liquid agony. Fire up SYSTM now, clip in, and turn those pedals.
Just rode this today. The workout itself was excellent, just what I needed today. Loved the storyline and the video, although I did do a double-take when the same clip was used twice in the first interval.
But the soundtrack… I can’t imagine a more uninteresting collection of royalty-free Epidemic Sound nondescript generic tracks. Not once did I get a shred of motivation from the music, rather the opposite. Older Sufferfest videos had emotion and soul in the song choices, this is just repetitive and demoralizing. I was sad when There Is No Try was downgraded to OL without music, and I’ll be even sadder if this is going to be the style for all new Sufferfest workouts. I’ll not be riding this one with sound on again.
Really enjoyed the workout, and the non-cycling footage and SUF lore was pretty good
Would have liked to see the efforts cut to a breakaway though; and the music seemed a bit “AI” - is there a chance to reuse some of the previously licensed SUF music? There’s plenty to choose from!
Looking forward to more SUF stuff - onwards and upwards!
The parts that I saw were great, but I haven’t finished it yet. Will save for another day. It’s much much better than some of the “remasters” for sure.
Firstly this is replacing BUTTER a much loved real SF workout. So it is a replacement and not a new workout
Second, I agree it’s effective but it’s not fun, boring footage, boring soundtrack, nothing SF alike besides some weak attempts with humour.
If the remaining SF workouts will be retired and replaced with lame stuff I’ll finally move away from the pf. I already have a TPV subscription for a year in parallel
It’s not a replacement for Butter. The workouts are similar but they are different. I think it’s fair to call this new. I don’t LOVE the soundtrack either, tbh, but like many of the classic SUF vids, I was broadly smiling through much of the SUF jokes, text bubbles etc etc. It’s the kind of thing you enjoy so much you forget you’re suffering.
As to the tunage…Well placed lyrics are some of that magic sauce that helped define some of the classic SUF vids. I’m not the only one with a bunch of those songs in an off the bike playlist. But, music is very personal and I know there are more than a couple Sufferlandrians who turn the music off and play their own. My 2 cents, honestly, the music for the most part works really well with this new workout.
Tl;dr:
This is an incredible effort at a new SUF vid.
